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What is Resilience and Why do you Need it?

Updated: Dec 13, 2020


re·sil·ience

[ri- zil-y uhns, - zil-ee- uhns or ri- zil-y uhn-see, - zil-ee- uhn-see]

NOUN

1. the power or ability to return to the original form, position, etc., after being bent, compressed, or stretched; elasticity

2. ability to recover readily from illness, depression, adversity, or the like; buoyancy.


Resilience is the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats or significant sources of stress — such as family and relationship problems, serious health problems or workplace and financial stressors. It means "bouncing back" from difficult experiences.

Research has shown that resilience is ordinary, not extraordinary. People commonly demonstrate resilience. One example is the response of many Americans to the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks and individuals' efforts to rebuild their lives.

Being resilient does not mean that a person doesn't experience difficulty or distress. Emotional pain and sadness are common in people who have suffered major adversity or trauma in their lives. In fact, the road to resilience is likely to involve considerable emotional distress.

Resilience is not a trait that people either have or do not have. It involves behaviors, thoughts and actions that can be learned and developed in anyone.


Think of resilience as similar to taking a kayak trip down a river.

My friend and I took kayaks down the Mississippi river, and we were quite surprised by the obstacles and challenges we encountered. Right away when we started out, we had to fight the current to avoid hitting cement chunks that were embedded in the river. We had to avoid rocks and take care while navigating rough rapids. At one point, the river got very shallow, and our kayaks got stuck in the sand so we had to work hard to get back in the deeper water.

There were points where we thought we might not be qualified to navigate the river, and there were times that were discouraging, but we knew that the only way to get back on dry land was to continue paddling until we got to our destination.

Like navigating the Mississippi River in a kayak, changes you experience in life may affect you differently along the way. In traveling the river, it would have helped to have knowledge about it and past experience in dealing with it. Since we had neither, we had to meet the challenges as they arose and paddle through. We gained insight and courage as we were able to get through each challenge. Having a trusted friend along for the journey was helpful and helped me feel support. We needed perseverance to get to our destination, and we made it!

A combination of factors contributes to resilience. Many studies show that the primary factor in resilience is having caring and supportive relationships within and outside the family. Relationships that create love and trust, provide role models and offer encouragement and reassurance help bolster a person's resilience.

Several additional factors are associated with resilience, including:

· The capacity to make realistic plans and take steps to carry them out.

· A positive view of yourself and confidence in your strengths and abilities.

· Skills in communication and problem solving.

· The capacity to manage strong feelings and impulses.

All of these are factors that people can develop in themselves.


Strategies For Building Resilience

Developing resilience is a personal journey. People do not all react the same to traumatic and stressful life events. An approach to building resilience that works for one person might not work for another. People use varying strategies. The strategy that has worked best for me is this: every day, think of (you can write or say out loud as well) 3 unique things you are grateful for, spend 3 minutes focusing on your breathing, and do 1 random act of kindness. Using this as a daily practice increases positive synapses in your brain and builds resilience!

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wejomc
Dec 12, 2020

Love this!!! So excited to read more!!!!

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